It is safe to say that most people would agree with this statement:
"The self is a function of its environment."
This can go a few different ways. First, the environment that creates the mold for the child, thus creating a predictable product. For example, a child of an alcoholic indulges in their substance of choice and becomes an addict. Second, the environment is perceived by the child as being so unfavorable that they become the exact opposite and "break the mold". Along with the first example, the child rarely consumes any alcohol in order to prevent a similar lifestyle of addiction. Lastly, we find a combination of the two. Growing up in a home environment with pressure to be one thing or the other in order to satiate the "social norm" of the family. This is where we find most children.
Our culture is moving in many directions, and one that has always fascinated me was the pressures on our society to look a certain way. In the 80s, we saw the birth of fitness. Aerobics classes were the norm for all adults, especially women, and a community of fitness was born strip malls all over America. Into the 90s we saw a change in men focusing more and more on achieving that buff/chiseled look Arnold Schwarzenegger style. Us women, we still attended our classes, but began to discover the world outside Jane Fonda. The millennium has brought to us many new ideas about what you can do to look the way "we" think you should. Gyms are still popular, extreme sports have come into play, and a spiritual side of health via yoga and pilates has really become the norm for many.
What is scary is that many young adults and teens do not prioritize fitness, though they want to still look as though they do. Yes, many children and teenagers are involved in some type of sport, and yes you can exercise without joining a gym--there are a million exceptions to every claim. Generally speaking though, many young Americans are just trying to survive their life. They have school, the media, friends, and their family to balance all at once and frankly in most cases each is pulling them in a different direction. How to they cope? Do they become the mold, break the mold, or crack somewhere in between?
The attached article is about the family impact on anorexic teenagers. These teens are working to achieve a physical likeness at the expense of their own health. How do they even know this is what is "desirable"? The media is an easy answer, and one of the most often used excuses in my opinion. Do the parents themselves work to achieve this same physical likeness and therefore apply pressure to the child creating a seemingly impossible goal, or are the parents so far in the opposite direction (our country's growing obese population) that the child wants nothing more than to not look like that? Is the child somewhere in between with supportive parents who can not identify with the pressures the child is facing outside of the home during this hormonally charged time?
The study found that when families participated in recovery, the changes for a more solidified outcome were much increased. I think that regardless of where the foundation for the behavior came from, a supportive and involved environment (preferably the home environment) with reduced pressures is ideal for recovery. A stable home is not always possible, but if you know someone who is struggling with an eating disorder, become their "family" and share in their life. Work with them and hopefully with their treatment program to find out where their illness stems from, and support them in building a new foundation based on their own "sense of self". And if you yourself struggle in any way, I invite you to ask yourself:
- What pressures do I feel from my family, friends, the media, work, school, etc.?
- What behaviors do I engage in daily that give in to these pressures?
- How do I really view myself outside of what others may say?
Please take some time to read the article and examine your thoughts and feelings. Do we make our decisions as a function of our environment (the Chicken), or do we decide independently to appease the self (the Egg)? Start with what you like about your self, write it down, and put it somewhere where you can see it. Add to this list whenever you feel like it, or discover something new that compliments your "Sense of Self".
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